The Story So Far

The new semester started a little while ago and all ready time is moving so quickly. After passing last semester without a problem, I've become too careless and I signed up for some really hard classes. Oh no! One is a math class that is driving me crazy and the other is an American history class focused on Native Americans. It's extremely difficult. And to make matter worse, there is cute guy in my class named Brendan. We've known each other before class but our relationship isn't that close, so he ignores my existence in class although I have occasionally caught him staring at me. I'm too shy to approach him. Curse my shyness. grrr. But that's just the least of my problems.

There is another guy in my class that talked about me while I was talking in front of the class. He whispered I was "stupid" and "pathetic". My friend in class overheard and told me all about it. I became enraged. So, out of anger I retaliated by quietly confronting the guy. I couldn't confront the guy in class because I didn't want Brendan to see that ugly side of me.

The guy quickly denied all allegations but the guilty smile that flashed on his face was enough proof for me. I think he denied it because he wanted to avoid fighting. Don't talk shit if you can't fight with your fists! So, then I decided to stop handling the situation in a nice way and instead my friend and I talked badly about the guy right behind him! I know right, I'm really a bold person when anger takes control over me. He over heard it but ignored it.

Ever since then I haven't heard anything about him talking about me badly, but I keep running into the guy everywhere on campus unintentionally. Omg! It's so awkward. He probably thinks I'm a crazy nut that's stalking him or something. He always gives me a funny look. I'm not sure what it means. I pretend as if I don't notice the guy when I see him but still I feel awkward. The other day the guy was with his friend and I heard him whisper "that's the guy". He really is a bad whisperer. His friend shot a quick glance at me but nothing has become of that situation. And the other day in class I wanted to sit next to Brendan without it seeming obvious that I really like him, I didn't notice but the guy that talked badly about me happened to be in the next seat over from the seat I chose. And since it isn't a spot where I normally sit, it made it seem like I was trying to bother that guy by sitting next to him, so he gave me a dirty look. I hate miscommunications.

So the next class, the guy was absent and the seats near Brendan were all full. I hate my life. The class after that I ditched because I had other important things I wanted to do, so I'm sure that guy was relieved. lolz. But now this upcoming class I plan on asking Brendan if I can borrow his notes since I missed a class. Hopefully this could turn into something more like FRIENDSHIP or something ;)