Meh.

Easing back into my daily routine is difficult. I am not exactly aware of why it's difficult but recently, school started again and even though I had a month of vacation, I can't seem to get a grip on my studies. There aren't any cute guys in my classes to take my mind off of the miserable lecture. My classes are so boring but I can't complain because school is always boring. Bleh. But also, I no longer have a job and in all honesty, I'm not looking for a job at the moment. I have no money and a long list of things to buy. And that may seem like a horrible situation but it's better than cashiering at a dead-end job, so in that reality, I am happy.

Right now, I can't say much about the way I feel. I know I've had some ups and downs. I'm okay now...I think. At least I hope I will be okay. No mood-swings or mind-crushing depressive attacks. I am not crazy. Sometimes I'm a little lost but I think I found my way. Also, I'm excited to watch the remake of the Ai no Kusabi OVA. I'll watch it tonight.

I have developed a coffee addiction..

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2012

It's only January and I'm battling intense stress. Welcome 2012. This was intended to be a short post, so I'm done. Oh yeah, Sekaiichi Hatsukoi season 2 was amazing. My favorite character changed. A little while ago I thought Ritsu & Takano were the best but now I really prefer Chiaki even though I never liked Hatori. Is that possible? The complexity of my decision is too long to discuss right now, but strangely enough Chiaki gives me inspiration or something. Who's your favorite character or pairing?

Sekaiichi Hatsukoi OVA 2

It was so cute. Omg. The OVA follows Chiaki and Hatori's relationship. I wish there were more kissing scenes. Bummer. But its cute and we get to see how intimate they are since after all they were childhood friends. But Chiaki receives a phone call from his mother, forcing him to visit home. He brings Hatori to his home. They see his pushy mother and shy sister. They face the typical yaoi/ boyslove couple real life problem: how can the only son tell his parents that he's dating his childhood friend? Chiaki is then conflicted with the thought that his sister would be best for Hatori because she is a girl and his mother will appreciate it more if he also had a girlfriend. And then I got this random thought: Chiaki and his sister look very similar just like Wataru and Karin Fujii from OTRFK. Just a random thought, but it reminded me of that; w/e. But anyways, Chiaki is jealous which is so cute lolz :3 And then, so sweet, Hatori kisses him! eek! The end is the cutest when Hatori questions Chiaki's decision to drop the character that resembles Hatori and Chiaki replies b/c he doesn't like drawing the heroine in scenes with the character based off his lover. lolz those aren't his exact words but still it was cute lolz XD Can't wait for season 2 of Sekaiichi Hatsukoi.

Lumpy Arms :'(

The first time I tried Yardley of London oatmeal and almond, I was in an I’ll-try-anything-once mood: a Hollister shirt hugging my figure with a mane of sunshine blonde hair and tight denim cuffed above my ankles. The packaging of the soap bar was tempting. The soap was like a loveletter sprayed w/ perfume. It had attracted the attention of so many resulting in Yardley’s legendary reputation.

Yardley started in 1770 as a limited British cosmetic line before its successful products became global. My skin was dry and sensitive, so I when a product worked, I used it for life. Burt’s Bees was always a god send for me too. The soap carried a luxurious scent and my body wore a coat of suds. Its rich lather was impressive for its price. My skin rivaled silk after every use. Yardley was my new beauty addiction.

A year of use had passed and the soap never lost its charm. I used it in my daily routine until I noticed a difference. A bad difference. My arms. My arms were suffering. The forearm was covered in little whiteheads. I panicked. I was a pickle. It resembled a Nestle crunch bar. No itching or burning just ugliness. I didn't accuse Yardley. My new beauty gem couldn't be letting me down. I googled the condition. No luck on a cure. I tried a Neutrogena astringent. Nothing. I tried a moisturizer. I even prayed. My pickle arms remained. I couldn't live with lumpy skin. And finally my mom suggested life without Yardley. It was a struggle….but I was desperate. I kicked the habit with a solution. Dove.

What Have I learned?

Now this is very difficult for me to talk about b/c its about my family and well, family issues are just so extremely difficult for me to talk about--blog about anything. My family has money problems. I don't but the rest of my family does. For example: I buy everything name brand, have an android phone and I buy anything I want. I have a job and I always thought that isn't the reason people get jobs is so they can buy themselves stuff and pay their own bills. I like shopping. My family on the other hand, try to hold on to every penny and watch over how much I'm spending, hoping that the money I don't spend can be spent on them. Crazy, huh? I'm called selfish by my family because I go to work to make money and use the money on stuff i want. And they complain that I buy useless expensive things but still that's not their concern. Its my money, I can do whatever I want with it. My sibling is unemployed and has this belief that I'm lazy and my job isn't hard work for my money. My job may not be extremely hard but I take a lot of shit from customers and I don't even make that much money. I go to work and I write short stories and stuff while my sibling lays in bed all day--doing nothing.

And my sibling asks me to buy chips and soda and candy but doesn't wanna pay me back because he's unemployed. What kind of bullshit is that? Especially when he offered to pay me back and now he's saying I shouldn't accept the money that he pays me bac

k with. My response to that is then don't ask for snacks you can't fucking afford. And now my sibling feels that I should buy him a $60 dollar item. Just because I have a job doesn't mean I'm loaded w/ cash but to my family, if you're working a job then your money should be spent on them. But when my sibling had a job making way more than I've ever made we're talking $600 bi -weekly.I didn't get nothing for no $60. And for xmas which is also my birthday, my sibling bought 2 video games systems a Wii and PS3. My

sibling didn't even buy me a gift for xmas/b-day. Just b/c I have job doesn't mean anyone deserves a cent of my money. They say I but only stuff for myself--expensive useless stuff. That's just the stupidest shit I ever heard because I could easily say the same thing about the stuff they buy. And my sibling buys expensive $160 shoes and shirts and stuff. With that money my sibling should have bought the wanted $60 item. Am I seriously in the wrong here?

Should I Stay Or Should I Go

People come and go

Even when you want them to stay

Because when they go

You miss them

But sometimes its better if they go

And you stay

Because people go their separate ways

Even when you want to leave on good terms

Sometimes it’s the bad terms that make them go

And hard to make them stay

When they want you to go

Because you want them to stay and go.

But one can only go or stay

So I will go

So you can stay the same great person you’ve always been.

Relaxing Or Painful!?

This is silly but very painful. Im glad its not severe b/c I know I will be ok or at least I hope I'll be ok. I'm in so much pain right now. Sitting here typing is kinda painful b/c I can't turn my head, I have to turn my body. I woke up this morning and stretched in a funny way and instantly my neck like snapped. So yeah my neck is in so much pain that I can't turn my head. Took a hot shower and right now my neck isn't as awful as earlier still very painful and my head is cocked to the right. Trying to relaxing & not think about the pain, I downloaded Body Language by Aki Morimoto on my kindle app for android. It's a pretty good yaoi novel. Second time reading it. If you haven't read it, I'm probably gonna do a review on it maybe...xxxooox au revoir & hopefully I'll feel better soon. :'(